I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat