new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I need to align my fucking chakras
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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