Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
