No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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