I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
