I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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