Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
