i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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