real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
