yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
