I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
FUCK WHALES
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize