I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize