Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
