we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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