I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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