none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
