Just mADE A PArabola og urine
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize