i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
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