So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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