Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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