I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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