grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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