I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
