i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
bring money and cleavage
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
