Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
That accounts for only three of the penises
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
