My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
