so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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