thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
