May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
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