If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
