just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
