Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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