Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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