There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize