Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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