Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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