Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
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