Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
