Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
