The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Dear god my vagina.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
