I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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