I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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