just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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