he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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