He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize