we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I want to be your penis for a week.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize