Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
