So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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