His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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