Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
